Bitter Bottoms of Baltimore

“Even food shows are angry these days, with women throwing stuff and calling each other bitches… it’s awful… and then they cut to an interview in the ‘truth-booth’ where she says ‘I’m doing this for my kids’. Does she realize that her potty mouth and horribleness will soon be out on high definition blue ray for her kids and grandkids to enjoy forever? , a classic childhood moment.”

“yet, you continue to watch it each week……..”

“I know…. does it help if I feel dirty?”

“Could you imagine us on a reality show?”

“OMG! It would be a ratings bonanza! Move over Real Housewives of Hoboken, it’s The Bitter Bottoms of Baltimore!”

“For the record, I’d call you a filthy bitch out in the open, I wouldn’t wait for the truth booth.”

“How would people get eliminated?”

“One day your hot, and the next, you’re not. ah wedersehen. We could find some Swedish furry bodybuilder whose limited English language skills are that sentence.”

“We would still be friends after I win, right?”

“Someone’s gotta keep you from blowing the prize money on cute shoes.”

“Wha?”

“Imelda, please….”