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You've Got Mail

"Does it mean I'm old when the latest cool thing baffles me?" "Keep in mind, you've said previously that you miss AOL. So your reviews of technology are already suspect." "I miss hearing 'you've got mail' when I login. Email used to mean something." "Darling, today? Today its about skype and twitter, startrek is here. Twitter is meant for people on their phones fat finger typing. The guy that invented it is a gabillionaire." "I don't get twitter, the whole thing depresses me. It seems like people only tweet power-snark, as mean and cutting as possible in 140 characters. When it's not politics or bigotry, it's people retweeting links to kittens or *shudder* Bieber videos. And don't get started on the whole hashtag thing, hashtag asshat hashtag fail? I just want to hashtag vomit. Bleh! I mean would Kirk use Twitter?" "Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn is only 80 characters, so probably." 'It scares me that a) you knew that, and b) that you knew that."